Running a business is, by definition, demanding. Dealing with investors, employees and the general public whilst trying to build a solid reputation. Most of the time, we are able to rationalise our negative experiences, but occasionally, some comments can bring us down. 

One of the most important qualities is to develop a positive mindset, focusing on what’s going well. To live like this consistently and avoid getting bogged down, there are several proven strategies we can employ.

Don’t take it to heart

Firstly, we must recognise when we are reacting emotionally, rather than logically. This can be evidenced in thoughts such as: ‘Why did this bad thing happen to me?’, ‘I never hurt anyone’, or, ‘What that person said is so unfair .’ 

In business, we can’t afford to take everything personally. We don’t always know what’s motivating people to react negatively.

As difficult as it is, we must accept that business is tough. Not everyone will play fairly; some will even break the rules intentionally. As much as we’d like to focus on our financial objectives, future plans and goals, often we end up managing our emotions, dealing with inter-relational issues and navigating difficulties. 

This is a scenario that the Mikkelsen twins have grappled with, on several occasions. Rasmus Mikkelsen and Christian Mikkelsen, Co-Founders of Publishing Life, run an online education business that teaches regular everyday people how to replace their 9-5 job by creating passive income with self-publishing. 

Commenting on the personal challenges that can emerge occasionally, Rasmus says: “Sometimes, we’ll get messages where people don’t agree with our opinion or don’t like our easy-going nature. I used to get offended by their criticism and felt like I was doing something wrong. Now I’ve learnt that you can’t make everybody happy. The bigger you get, the more often you’ll see this. But the truth is, for every 1 person that is unhappy, I’ve made 10 other people happy. So I focus on that instead.”

Christian adds: “We always look forward and focus on our goals instead; things like this just don’t get us down. We’ve developed a new identity in the last few years— a more emotionally mature version of our younger selves, especially as the business has grown and we’ve taken on additional business responsibilities. Now we are both happily married, and focused on achieving our business goals to provide for our families.”

Reframe the events 

As an entrepreneur, when confrontation arises, whether it’s a disagreement with an employee or a bad review in the press, it’s vital to be able to defuse the situation and de-escalate a potential flash point. One way of doing this is to reframe your thoughts and feelings. Begin to look at events from a fresh perspective so that they no longer evoke the same negative response.  

For example, instead of focusing on how angry a comment made you feel, you can try to imagine what motivated the behavior. The key is compassion. How upset must the person have been at that moment? What events must have been going on in someone’s life to make them so angry or combative? 

By changing the narrative, and viewing events from a different angle, your emotions can start to change. Not only will you recover faster from drama, experiencing less cognitive drain, but you’ll also be able to turn your attention to more pressing matters like your business success. 

Rasmus comments: “Not everyone is going to react positively to everything you do. That’s just life. The trick is not to fight fire with fire: you have to empathize with others and try to understand what might be going on inside them. Why are they acting this way? Are they being driven by hurt? Is this coming from a ‘positive place’.”

Use negative events as a springboard into your future

It’s a common misconception that our business lives would be better if we didn’t have problems and setbacks. The opposite is actually true. You need a little bit of resistance and a little bit of difficulty to energize you, focus your efforts and make you more resilient. 

Think of the analogy of rubbing your hands with sandpaper. If you rub too hard, you cause your hands to bleed. However, if you rub it just a little bit every day, you will soon develop tough, impenetrable calluses. 

The Mikkelsen’s have certainly learned from their experiences over the last few years and have been able to turn that resistance and difficulty into a growing business. For them, there is no ‘secret’ to success; it is the ability to stick with something long enough to reap the rewards. 

 Christian adds, “If only people would do the hard work, and not just give up when things get tough. The perfect example is our business. We focused on one important thing for years, rather than dabbling for a few months and then trying something else. You see new trends all the time and instead of jumping on the bandwagon, we knew the future was in digital publishing. It’s not a “sexy” opportunity like crypto, but it’s an emerging market that’s here to stay and is growing each and every year.

Focus on life’s essentials 

He continues, “Adversity has a knack of stripping away what is unnecessary, unhelpful or untrue. When you’re faced with problems, you rethink your values. What do I believe in? What do I want to achieve?”

It seems inevitable that every seasoned businessperson will go through the fires of adversity: a process that burns off the dross of uncertainty and indecision and reveals a clarity of purpose. Some call it your ‘life’s mission’ or ‘calling’. In a business setting, this is invaluable. Knowing what you’re good at and how you can add value is the key to reaching your highest business potential.